Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
