shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
not ubering you a puppy
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
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