we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
So apparently I’m into choking now
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
