I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
