yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
