I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
