The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
