fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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