You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
