I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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