I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
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