my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
