There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
