ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
