he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
