Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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