I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
