Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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