I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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