im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize