Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
