You're so nebulous sometimes
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
FUCK WHALES
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
