wanna go halves on a baby?
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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