I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
