Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
