There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
