Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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