No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
