I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Houston, we have a blender
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize
