i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize