dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
