I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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