Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Randomize
