I am spending my child support on dildos
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
