The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
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