For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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