you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Found your dick twin last night
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Randomize