I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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