Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
