Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
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