Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
