There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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