Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize
