she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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