Im at strip club and am horny
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
and she was petting her beer can
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
