I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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