He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize