i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
