So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
