Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
